


Breakfast With a Side of Forgiveness

by angelsandbrowncoats, edwardnashtons (freckledandspectacled), freckledandspectacled



Series: Prompt Fics [3]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Communication, Feelings, First Dates, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Smut, Frottage, Guilt, Hand Jobs, Laughter During Sex, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstandings, Post-Coital Cuddling, Sexual Inexperience, Touch-Starved, fries is only there briefly, unprotected sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-16
Updated: 2018-10-16
Packaged: 2019-07-25 07:15:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16192715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelsandbrowncoats/pseuds/angelsandbrowncoats, https://archiveofourown.org/users/freckledandspectacled/pseuds/edwardnashtons, https://archiveofourown.org/users/freckledandspectacled/pseuds/freckledandspectacled
Summary: Edward has been staying with Oswald while he recovers, and while their relationship has progressed in a positive direction, both of them still want more.A sequel to"Broken, Not a Burden"as requested.





	Breakfast With a Side of Forgiveness

**Author's Note:**

> This was done in collaboration with my amazing friend! <3  
> I linked to the prequel in the summary since I didn't feel like making a two-work series, nor did I want to add a chapter & raise the rating on that fic.  
> 

“So? What’s the diagnosis?” 

 

“He’s fine,” Fries said, short as ever.

 

“What do you mean, ‘he’s fine,’?” Oswald frowned, “But - “

 

“I’ve been going over things with him, both his thoughts or experiences and exercises of the mind. There’s nothing wrong with his brain, other than perhaps being a bit rusty. With stimulation, he’s as normal as he’ll ever be.”

 

“But he’s been having so many problems…?”

 

“He’s convinced himself he has brain damage, just because it took him a few weeks for his brain to warm up.”

 

“So it’s all imaginary?”

 

“More or less. He believes he’s an idiot, so he is. But if he stopped believing it, it would stop being true.”

 

“That’s ridiculous.”

 

“That’s science.”

 

Oswald rolled his eyes, “Whatever. How do I help him believe in himself again?”

 

“Pardon my asking, but why do you care? You were the one that froze him in the first place.”

 

“That’s exactly why,” Oswald frowned, “I was acting selfishly, and I hurt the man I love. I have to do whatever I can to remedy that.”

 

Fries nodded slowly, “I understand. Just draw attention to his right answers without being too obvious. If he thinks anything is off, tell him what I told you. If he can figure out something’s wrong, he’s smart enough to combat it himself.

 

“Alright.”

 

“And my price?”

 

“I’ll get Strange to talk, don’t worry. If he’s got your wife in stasis somewhere, I’ll have it out of him before long.”

 

“Good. I want to know  _ immediately _ after you find anything.”

 

“Of course,” Oswald agreed, “And thank you.”

 

“No problem,” Fries answered, leaving the mansion, the heavy clank of his metal suit lingering behind him. Oswald took a moment to compose himself before stepping inside the drawing room. Edward had started a fire once Fries had left, and he was currently sitting as close to it as possible, curled up inside an armchair. His eyes were vacant, staring at a point on the wall across from him.

 

“Ed?” Oswald asked, stepping closer to him until he could rest a hand on Edward’s shoulder. Edward jumped, quickly looking up at him, “Oswald?”

 

“Are you okay?”

 

“Yes. He just asked me a bunch of questions…” Edward’s eyes turned glassy again before snapping back to the present, “What did he have to say?”

 

“He said you’ll be better in no time, and the damage is decidedly not permanent.”

 

“Really?” Edward looked at him, as if expecting Oswald to have been lying.

 

“Yes, really. You’ll be back to being the smartest man in Gotham any day now.”

 

“Thank you,” Edward said, reaching up to cover Oswald’s hand on his shoulder, “You have no idea how much this means to me.”

 

“Don’t thank me,” Oswald replied, “This is my fault. It’s the least I can do.”

 

“Oswald…” Edward glanced away, swallowing, before abruptly changing the subject, “So, um, I know you said I could stay here until everything was sorted, if I wanted to. I guess this means it’s sorted now, so do you - do you want me to leave?”

 

Oswald blinked, “I mean, if you want to. You will always have a room here, Ed. You can leave whenever you want to, but don’t feel obligated to.”

 

“Oh. Okay,” Edward bit his lip, “I’ll stay then.”

 

“Good,” Oswald extracted his hand, only to offer it to help Edward to his feet, “I’ll be glad for the company.”

 

~ ~ ~

 

Oswald woke to a strange smell. After he had been awake for a few seconds, he registered it as a  _ delicious  _ smell. Tying his robe on over his pajamas, he made his way towards the kitchen to investigate. 

 

When he got there, he was taken aback to see Edward at the stove, apron on over lounge pants and a sweater, watching whatever was in his pan extremely closely. Now that he thought about it, Edward being the source shouldn’t be surprising; there wasn’t anyone else in the mansion with them. But seeing him like this, all soft edges and domesticity, sent Oswald through a series of intense emotions: flashbacks to their time in Edward’s old apartment, flashbacks to the daydreams he used to have when he was the mayor, and an all-too present surge of love. He and Edward were taking it slow, he reminded himself. Edward wasn’t ready for that.

 

Or rather, Edward wasn’t ready to reciprocate yet. And while the guilt dug at him, Oswald could only express his love so much without reciprocation. Telling Edward he cared about him, holding him when he needed it, this Oswald was more than willing to do. But to come up behind him as he cooked, wrap his arms around his waist, and use Edward’s own body as leverage to lean up and press kisses to his neck was further than he was willing to go when Edward was still trying to figure out what he wanted. It was too intimate to be so one-sided.

 

Instead, he said a soft, “Good morning,” to let Edward know he was awake, approaching but leaving some distance between them. Edward glanced over his shoulder at him for approximately half a second before returning to the contents of the pan. In that fraction of time, Oswald had seen the wide but shy smile on his face and felt his heart melting. 

 

“Good morning, Oswald,” Edward answered, “I was hoping breakfast would be ready when you woke up, but I suppose it will at least be hot and fresh this way.”

 

“You didn’t have to,” Oswald told him.

 

“No, I wanted to,” he took in a deep breath and paused before continuing, “You keep apologizing for everything you’ve done, as if it were all your fault. I did things to you, too.”

 

“Ed, everything I did to you I did of my own volition. The same could not, I think, be said for you. I can’t say I fully understand what’s going on in that gorgeous brain of yours, but you cannot be blamed for the things it made you do.”

 

Edward bit his lip, “Be that as it may, I’m sure at least  _ some _ of what I did was of my own choosing.”

 

“Perhaps it was, but it was I who did not notice you struggling, it was I who wronged you first, and no amount of blaming yourself will change that. I am perfectly content to be the guilty party in our disagreement.”

 

“I don’t want that,” Edward whispered, and Oswald strained to hear him, “All I ever wanted was to find someone who was my equal and who treated me as such. You are, Oswald. You are my equal. So please, treat me like I am yours. Even if you do not think I need to be forgiven, let me apologize. When I - when I first met you, I admired you. When I took you in I hoped that I would be able to support you, and in return you could teach me. I hoped that maybe, when we had helped each other, we might even be friends. I only ever wanted to help you, and to make you like me. I never wanted to hurt you, and that’s what I did. Even if I had reasons, even if I wasn’t - wasn’t sa -  _ stable _ . I regretted it so much, but I - I didn’t know how to deal with it. Especially once you were gone. I was sure I’d killed you, and I would never be able to make it up to you, so I lied and lied and lied to myself. And then you were back and all I wanted to do was beg for your forgiveness but the lies were like a net I couldn’t break out of, and you were so  _ angry _ . You  _ hated  _ me. I couldn’t handle it. Any of it. But now we’re here, and someway, somehow everything feels like it might be okay. But I still haven’t apologized, like I wanted to. I think - I think I need to be forgiven just as much as I think you feel you need to. Does that make sense?”

 

Oswald stared at him, “Sort of? But even so, Ed - I  _ do  _ forgive you. So please, don’t trouble yourself about it.”

 

Edward shook his head, “That’s not - I can’t, I can’t trust that. I can’t understand why you’d just forgive me like that. I - I need - “

 

“What do you need?”

 

“I need to  _ earn _ your forgiveness.”

 

“Ed - “

 

“No,” he said, finally removing the contents of the pan - some delicate egg structure with a variety of herbs, “Just let me do this. Please?”

 

“I - alright. If making me breakfast is what it takes for you to feel better about everything, I suppose I can’t exactly complain.”

 

Edward gave him another shy smile as he transferred the eggs onto two plates and placed them at the breakfast table. Oswald felt his mouth water as he spotted the hollandaise sauce already waiting at the table.

 

“Please, sit,” Edward said as he returned to his post in the kitchen, “There are cinnamon apple muffins in the oven, they’ll be done in a minute.”

 

Oswald did as requested, marvelling at the treatment. Here he was, stewing in guilt over everything he’d done to Edward, and Edward was practically pampering him with food in some misguided attempt to earn forgiveness he already had. It was confusing, to say the least. 

 

Edward soon returned to the table, a basket of steaming muffins in hand, and sat down opposite him. 

 

“This is wonderful, Ed,” Oswald told him after they’d been eating for a few minutes, “Everything is absolutely perfect. You’ve truly outdone yourself.”

 

Edward glowed under the praise, something he had - thankfully, in Oswald’s eyes - retained from his days as Oswald’s chief of staff. 

 

“I’m sure it’s not - “

 

“Ed,” Oswald said firmly, unable to stop the burst of emotion when Edward gave him his signature startled, puppy-dog eyes look, “Take the damn compliment.”

 

“A - Alright,” Edward swallowed down his self-doubts, “Thank you.”

 

Their meal continued on in silence for some time before Oswald finally spoke up again, “Ed, I’ve been thinking.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Would you do me the pleasure of attending the symphony with me?”

 

Edward’s eyes widened, and it would have been comical if Oswald’s heart hadn’t been pounding in his chest, “Are - are you asking me on a date? With you?”

 

“I - yes, Ed. I’d like to do this properly. Court you, and all that. My mother raised a gentleman, after all.”

 

“You - you want to  _ court me _ .”

 

“Yes. We’ve been on the wrong foot for too long. As you said, we are equals, but in the past there has always been a power imbalance between us. I have been your mentor, your employer, and your nemesis. But I love you, Ed, I really do, and if there’s a chance you might love me back, I want to do this the right way. Take you out not just because I need you to accompany me, but because I want to spend time with you, because I want to watch you enjoy things and enjoy them with you.”

 

“That’s,” Edward sighed, staring at his plate, “That’s the sweetest thing I think anyone’s ever said to me.”

 

“I’ll endeavor to be even sweeter in the future, then,” Oswald replied.

 

“Okay. I’d love to go to the symphony with you.”

 

“Wonderful,” Oswald smiled at him, and Edward finally looked up and grinned back.

 

~ ~ ~

 

The symphony was amazing. The music was thrilling, the musicians were skilled, and Oswald’s private box had nearly blown his mind. Edward was having the time of his life. The only downside was that, while he and Oswald were seated near enough that their arms touched, Oswald hadn’t done anything else. Edward would have expected at least  _ hand-holding _ on their date. Maybe even an arm around his shoulders. Probably nothing more than that, considering how Oswald had stressed he was a  _ gentleman _ earlier, but still…

 

Perhaps he was nervous. It was their first date after all, and possibly Oswald’s first  _ ever _ date, at least to Edward’s knowledge. 

 

But then came the date at the museum, where Oswald kept about a foot in between them at most times and only tapped his shoulder once or twice. And then the restaurant, where Oswald pulled out his chair for him, spoiled him with fine wine and fed him a bite of dessert right off his fork like some cheesy rom-com but still didn’t so much as hold his hand. Then there was movie night at the mansion, and he had fallen asleep on Oswald’s shoulder and woken to the comfortable weight of an arm around him and a head leaning against his, but the moment Oswald realized he was awake, he withdrew. It was starting to drive Edward to worry and distraction. 

 

Was he not enough? Had spending time with him like this caused Oswald to realize he wasn’t in love with him after all? It felt so unfair - he was finally coming to terms with liking men, liking  _ Oswald _ , possibly even loving him, and now Oswald was going to tell him he’d changed his mind? He couldn’t stand the idea. He began sitting closer to Oswald when they were on the couch, laying his hand near Oswald’s space on the table - once he even tried to leave the mansion on a cold day without his jacket so Oswald would have to hold him to keep him warm, but Oswald noticed before they left and  _ reminded  _ him to get his coat. Every time Oswald blatantly ignored his obvious pleas for affection, Edward felt his heart sinking lower. It was infuriating. It was nerve-wracking. It was too much to handle and in no way enough to have. 

 

He felt the meltdown coming days, possibly even weeks before it happened. The actual trigger was some tiny, innocuous thing. He had tried the cold trick again, only this time it was coming home cold so Oswald would have to help him warm up. Oswald had fussed, making a fire in the fireplace, making tea, getting him blankets. But the last straw was when Oswald handed him the tea cup, and their fingers didn’t even brush. 

 

He couldn’t stand it anymore. 

 

“You hate this, don’t you,” he said in a resigned voice.

 

Oswald froze where he stood by the couch, not even twitching, as he asked, sounding bewildered, “What do I hate?”

 

“This,” Edward gestured between them, “Pretending you want me because you feel guilty and are afraid I’ll fall apart if you back out now.”

 

“What.”

 

“I’ve been getting better ever since I admitted that I might feel things back for you. You’re afraid that if you tell me how you’ve realized you don’t actually want me, it’ll undo all the progress I’ve made.”

 

“What on earth are you talking about, Ed?” Oswald asked, seemingly mystified.

 

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!” Edward shouted, snapping, “The only time you  _ ever _ touch me anymore is when I come to you after a nightmare and ask if I can stay with you. We’ve been on  _ eight _ dates now, and you haven’t even held my hand! You won’t hug me or hold me or kiss me or  _ touch  _ me. I can only assume you’ve decided the prospect is unappealing but are too gentlemanly to tell me so. I can only assume you don’t want me anymore.”

 

Oswald was staring at him now.

 

“Ed, there’s been a  _ massive _ misunderstanding.  _ I love you _ .”

 

“Then why won’t you act like it?” Edward asked, his voice breaking, looking - and feeling - on the verge of tears. Oswald hesitantly reached out to cup his face, hands hovering a centimeter away. Edward couldn’t help but leaning into them until they were touching, sighing at the contact. 

 

“I - I didn’t think it was my place. You were still recovering, and you were still trying to figure out your own feelings. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, so I figured I’d let you initiate all the contact.”

 

That gave Edward pause. He hadn’t actually thought about initiating anything. It had never been his nature to take control. Control was hard when you were constantly at war with yourself.

 

He felt himself relax as Oswald sat beside him, pulling him into an embrace so reminiscent of the one from nearly a year ago, after Edward had nearly died. Oswald held him close, hand stroking over his hair and back, “I’m so sorry, Ed. I didn’t realize my actions were hurting you, making you feel unwanted. Hurting you is what I was trying to avoid. I just keep messing up though, don’t I?”

 

“No,” Edward shook his head, “I’m sure it’s my fault.”

 

Things were  _ always _ his fault.

 

“No, Ed. I should have noticed. No, more than that, I should have been open with you from the start. You wanted us to be equals, and if I had been treating you as an equal, I would have just asked what your boundaries are. I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s okay,” Edward told him - even if it hadn’t been, it was now, “Just touch me more.”

 

Oswald pulled back slightly, moving his hands back to cup Edward’s jaw, “First I need you to tell me how far is too far.”

 

Edward shook his head, “I want to be yours, Oswald. I want to go all the way,” he paused, ducking his head, “If - if you want me like that, I mean.”

 

Oswald tilted his head back up to meet his eyes, “I most certainly do, my love. But are you absolutely certain? We haven’t even kissed yet.”

 

“Then I guess you’d better do something about that,” Edward replied, lifting his chin in a gesture that was somewhere between a challenge and a plea. Oswald’s eyes widened slightly, the only sign of nervousness as the predator’s hunger took over his expression. He leaned forward deliberately, covering Edward’s lips with his own. The kiss was intense, charged, even if it lacked finesse. Oswald pulled back after a time, “I’m sorry if I’m not that good.”

 

“I don’t mind helping you practice,” Edward said with what he hoped was a saucy wink. The emotions from before still weighed heavily on him, but he genuinely wanted this. He’d been waiting so long for Oswald to take him, wanting it long before he came to terms with his feelings. He just needed to make sure Oswald knew he was fully on board. 

 

“You’re sure this isn’t going too fast?” Oswald asked as he let his thumbs stroke over Edward’s cheekbones, “You really want to do this tonight?”

 

“We’ve been on  _ eight dates _ , Oswald. That’s more dates than I’ve been on with anyone else put together. Plus, we’ve known each other for even longer,” Edward said matter-of-factly; his track-record was of jumping into bed with people after only a few dates, after all, “Besides, I want - I need to  _ feel _ you.”

 

Edward watched Oswald’s Adam’s apple dip as he swallowed, eyes tracking over Edward’s blanket-clad form with something like trepidation. He glanced to the side and confessed, “I may not be too skilled at—at  _ that _ , either.”

 

“You can say  _ sex _ , Oswald,” Edward said, voice soft and smile gentle in order to let Oswald know that he wasn’t making fun of him. Oswald flushed and sputtered absurdly, and it was everything in Edward’s power not to giggle at his reaction. This was about keeping him comfortable and having a good time together as they explored a new physical aspect of their relationship. 

 

“I—I can say  _ sex _ ,” Oswald protested. “It just seems too… too  _ technical _ . Impersonal. This isn’t just  _ sex _ .”

 

“It’s not,” Edward agreed. “But you have nothing to worry about. I can’t exactly say I’m experienced in this particular act myself.” Edward let the blanket fall from his shoulders and pressed closer to Oswald’s side, wrapping his arms around Oswald’s shoulders. “Regardless, I want to do this with you. Not just sex, but.... I want you to take me to bed and I want to—I want to make love with you. Does that sound better?”

 

Oswald surged forward quite suddenly and kissed him with  _ ferocity _ , fingers grasping at the back of the thin jacket he’d worn out in the cold. Edward let out a soft  _ hmmph _ of surprise and then melted into it, guiding the firm press of Oswald’s lips on his into something a little more closely resembling a kiss. Edward shievered and held him tighter, Oswald’s want more clear than ever in his desperate pulling at Edward’s clothing. He felt the strangest sense of relief, knowing that his concerns had been unfounded. The passion Oswald was exhibiting spoke louder to him than any assurances could have, and for once he had the sense that they were on the same page—at least when it came to their desire for one another. 

 

“That sounds perfect,” Oswald said, kissing the side of his mouth, as if he was hesitant to leave the kiss completely in order to speak properly. Edward’s head spun, and it took him a moment to register what Oswald was agreeing to.

 

“You—I—okie dokie,” Edward babbled, shifting his seat on the couch. “We should probably, ah…  _ bed _ ?”

 

“Bed,” Oswald nodded in agreement, the pair standing in unison, hands dangling awkwardly at their sides. Edward twisted his together, a nervous habit, only to find Oswald’s hand moving lightning quick to grasp one. Edward stared down at his hand in Oswald’s for a moment, something like shyness permeating his body language as he lifted his gaze to meet Oswald’s. In response, Oswald raised his brows meaningfully, and Edward nodded in agreement. A moment later Oswald was tugging him along to their— _ his _ bedroom, fumbling a moment with the knob before bursting through the doorway. Having waited long enough, Edward reached out and cupped Oswald’s face, cradling the line of his jaw in his palms and tilting Oswald’s head up for a better angle. He would kiss him  _ properly  _ or not at all. 

 

Oswald’s reaction was enthusiastic, to say the least. He pushed Edward back against the door a little too hard for Edward’s liking, but he enjoyed being the object of Oswald’s zealous behavior too much to mind it. Parting his lips, he allowed his tongue to tease Oswald’s bottom lip fleetingly. Fingers dug harder into his hips, alerting him to their presence. Edward rolled his hips into Oswald’s grip, finding more than he’d bargained for as he brushed against a prominent bulge in Oswald’s trousers. Gasping, he broke the kiss and looked down on Oswald’s through half-lidded eyes. 

 

“I want to feel your skin on mine,” Edward told him, dragging a hand down Oswald’s chest. “Undress me.”

 

Oswald flushed and fumbled with the buttons of his shirt as Edward returned the favor. When the last of Edward’s buttons was undone he shrugged out of his jacket and shirt and frantically pulled Oswald’s dress shirt out of his pants, ripping off his tie hastily and perhaps a little less gently than he could have been. Before Oswald’s shirt even hit the ground Edward pulled him into an embrace and locked their lips together, turning and backing towards the bed. He’d promised to show some  _ initiative _ of his own, after all. 

 

“You’re so warm,” Oswald remarked, hands spanning the small of Edward’s back. Edward hummed and nibbled on his bottom lip, basking in the feeling of the heat rising between them. 

 

“You too,” Edward said, all the breath knocked out of him a moment later as Oswald  _ shoved _ him back. It was a moment before he registered that while he  _ was  _ looking up at the ceiling, he was  _ not  _ in pain; instead, a soft mattress beneath him had cushioned him during his sudden transition from vertical to horizontal. He’d let out a soft  _ oomph  _ as he hit the sheets, immediately looking for Oswald once he’d reoriented himself. As it were, Oswald was just reaching for his belt buckle, tugging at it like he was angry for the obstruction it was creating. Once loose, he whipped it out from around Edward’s waist and threw behind himself without any care, already attacking the button on Edward’s slacks. He quickly dealt with that and the zipper, tugging Edward’s pants down his legs so quickly Edward nearly followed them off the bed. 

 

“Slow down,” Edward cautioned, sitting up and putting his hands on Oswald’s shoulders. He tugged Oswald down into a kiss and then tugged again until he was firmly situated atop him. While he appreciated Oswald’s enthusiasm, what they were currently attempting was definitely not a race of any sort. Edward groaned as Oswald’s hardness came in contact with his own through their remaining clothing, spreading his legs so Oswald could wedge himself more tightly between them. 

 

“Sorry,” Oswald murmured between kisses, crawling onto the bed and pushing Edward across the quilt to make room. 

 

“Don’t be,” Edward assured him, adopting a more mischievous expression as he leaned in. Using what he hoped was a somewhat sexy tone, he tugged at Oswald’s bottom lip until it popped free and then whispered, “I liked it.”

 

It had the desired effect, emboldening Oswald to lean down and capture Edward’s lips once more, rolling his hips down into him and making Edward moan helplessly beneath him. Needing more contact, Edward reached between them and scrambled to undo the fastenings of Oswald’s pants, pulling the fly free. 

 

“Pants off,” Edward demanded, pushing at Oswald’s chest to end the kiss. Oswald shoved them down to his knees and leaned in again, tongue sweeping into Edward’s mouth for the first time. Edward closed his eyes and melted into the mattress at the feeling, eyes fluttering closed against his will. It took everything he had to tilt his head back and break the kiss, tone no-nonsense as he repeated himself. “I said  _ off _ .”

 

“I never imagined you’d be  _ bossy _ ,” Oswald grumbled, shuffling to the end of the bed and standing. He shoved his pants and underwear down in one move, to Edward’s surprise. Edward completely forgot whatever retort he’d been about to deliver at the sight of Oswald fully nude. Swallowing, Edward nervously gauged the sight of what lay between Oswald’s legs and wondered if it would get any bigger. While it was far from  _ monstrous _ , Oswald was certainly  _ endowed.  _ It had to be at least six inches already, and he was only semi-erect.

 

“What did you imagine?” Edward asked him, peeling his eyes away from Oswald’s crotch. 

 

“I, well, I just—,” Oswald cut himself off as he moved onto the bed once more. “It’s nothing.”

 

“You imagined having sex with me?” Edward inquired, eyes inevitably drifting again. Oswald’s red face was answer enough. 

 

“Nothing  _ crude _ ,” Oswald protested, averting his gaze. Edward reached out and touched his jawline with the tips of his fingers, gently encouraging Oswald to look back at him. 

 

“You know,” he began, smiling softly up at Oswald. “I did too.” Oswald smiled gratefully in return, bending and kissing him gently. 

 

“What did you imagine?” Oswald asked, kissing his cheek, his jawline. Edward shivered and struggled to reply the lower he went. His fingers drifted into Oswald’s hair, the other hand pushing down between his shoulder blades until Oswald’s body was against his. 

 

“Usually, you start by kissing me,” Edward began, rocking his hips involuntarily as Oswald began kissing and licking at his throat, sucking on his pulse point and biting at his jugular. “You— _ hmm _ —you touch me.” Now Oswald was laving attention onto his collarbones, and Edward could already tell his focus on them would leave its mark in the morning. “And I touch you.”

 

“I’d like that,” Oswald murmured, and it was only then that Edward realized he’d been squandering his opportunity to explore Oswald’s body in turn. He remedied this immediately, pulling Oswald down into a kiss by the nape of his neck and exploring his smooth chest with his other hand. He brushed fingers over a nipple and relished the gasp it drew. “What else?”

 

“I like to imagine you—your…” Edward flushed and went quiet. He’d never discussed this desire with anyone before, and wondered briefly if this was how Oswald felt talking about sex at all. 

 

“Tell me,” Oswald coaxed, “I want to make you feel good.” In a way Edward felt like he was failing. He was the one meant to be leading this, showing Oswald what he liked instead of playing coy and waiting for him to ask. He resolved to do better. 

 

“Obviously I… I don’t know what you imagined but I—I want to feel you inside me,” ears burning, he struggled to elaborate. “I can show you what I like—well, that is, if you’re okay with using your fingers.” Swallowing, he can’t even look Oswald in the eye as he details what he wants. But he knows it’s important that they communicate and that he doesn’t try to protect Oswald from doing anything he’s uncomfortable with. Instead, he needs to be honest about his desires and trust that Oswald will be truthful with him if there’s anything he doesn’t want to do. Otherwise they’ll be right back where they started, on completely different pages and unhappy with the result. He won’t allow that to happen with Oswald’s first time, with  _ their _ first time. 

 

“Maybe—and only if you wanted to—you can also… use your penis?” Edward forced out, biting his bottom lip immediately after, as if wishing he could bite his words back. He eventually dared to look up at Oswald’s face when he didn't immediately respond, finding him flushed and bewildered. 

 

“I—” Oswald cleared his throat. “First and foremost, please don’t say  _ penis  _ again, it’s just too—”

 

“Technical,” Edward interrupted. “Less technical terms overall: check.”

 

“Right. And, secondly, I… I want that too. You asked me earlier what it was I imagined, but I didn’t want to push it—”

 

“We just talked about this,” Edward interrupted once more, sitting up on his elbows. “Don’t treat me like I’m going to break if you do what you want to me. I already promised to tell you if you do something I don’t enjoy, and I’m trusting you to do the same. I want you to treat me like I’m yours to take… because I  _ am _ . I belong to you just as much as you belong to me; now  _ act  _ like it.” He huffed and laid back down, eyes sparkling with challenge. 

 

“Now tell me what you imagine.” Oswald glanced away for a moment and then turned his attention back to Edward, brushing his hair back away from his face. 

 

“It starts like this,” Oswald began, voice low. “I’m kissing you, we’re both undressed. You touch me, sometimes you use your mouth on me.” At that, he ran a thumb over Edward’s bottom lip as Edward watched on, entranced. 

 

“It’s not easy to… to describe. We both are desperate for one another, you tell me how much you need me and I… then I’m inside of you. Sometimes you’re on top, because you just couldn’t wait, pushing me down and… and putting me inside. Sometimes I use my fingers on you until you’re begging me for it, begging for  _ me _ , and only then will I—I’ll make love to you,” Oswald was careful in his wording, avoiding anything Edward was beginning to perceive he imagined as being ‘crude’. 

 

“I would be open to any of that,” Edward told him, assuring Oswald that nothing he wanted was something he should try to hide. He himself had some less…  _ vanilla _ desires, but that was something he’d save for when they’d figured out the basics together. Hopefully they’d get to their other wants another time. For now, any of the things Oswald had described would be more than enough to deal with. “I’m glad we seem to... complement one another.” 

 

While he wouldn’t have minded if Oswald never wanted to penetrate him, he certainly wouldn't have refrained from doing so on his own. Hopefully, doing it  _ with _ Oswald would be much more enjoyable. He also would have been perfectly content if Oswald had similar desires, but it would only be fair that he get a turn somewhere down the line. However, finding out that Oswald already independently wanted to fulfill the role that Edward would prefer him in was a best case scenario, and neither of them would have to compromise. At least, not for this first encounter. Oswald smiled at him.

 

“That does appear to be the case. So… did you—should we—?”

 

“Let’s just see where it goes,” Edward suggested, wrapping his arms around Oswald’s shoulders. “You can do whatever you want to me.” Oswald groaned at the prospect and covered Edward’s lips with his own. He parted them, allowing Oswald to press his tongue inside. The friction between them as Oswald began exploring his mouth was sending sparks throughout his body. Edward moaned and wrapped his legs around Oswald’s hips, pushing up against him to seek more of it. There was only one layer left between them, and suddenly he couldn’t stand to have it there any longer. Edward grabbed at Oswald’s wrist and dragged his hand down to his hip until it was touching the fabric of his boxer-briefs. Breaking the kiss, he gazed fiercely up into Oswald’s sea-green eyes. “Take them off.”

 

“Bossy,” Oswald teased, still panting from their heated kiss. The smile on his face let Edward know he wasn’t too upset over it, leaning back and taking far too long to pull the fabric all the way down Edward’s legs. Quickly growing impatient, Edward tugged Oswald back down between them and kicked his underwear the rest of the way off. Moaning as their cocks brushed together, Edward snuck a hand down between them and took hold of Oswald in his grasp. He was hot, and definitely as thick as the largest toy he’d used recently, if not thicker. Edward felt him carefully, exploring the veins and ridges as Oswald groaned and twitched in his grasp before finally wrapping a hand around him. Oswald immediately bucked into his grasp as Edward smirked. Of course, it still wasn’t ideal…

 

“This would be better with lube,” Edward told him, thumb brushing under the glans and then over the head of his cock. “Do you have any in here?”

 

“Of course,” Oswald grit out, thrusting unto Edward’s hand. “Hold on.” Edward let go and spit into his hand, stroking himself delicately. He was already keyed up from the idea of having someone else inside him, it wouldn’t do to get too excited just yet. Oswald rummaged through the nightstand and passed Edward the bottle. “Will this work for… for later?”

 

“It will,” Edward said, pouring some into his palm. He let it warm for a moment and then wrapped his hand around Oswald once more, stroking more firmly and twisting his fist around the head. Oswald moaned and sunk down into him, kissing his shoulder. Edward turned his head so he could whisper in Oswald’s ear, a hint of desperation escaping him in spite of himself. “Touch me?”

 

“Of course, love,” Oswald groaned, kissing his throat before lifting his head. He poured some lube into his palm even as his hips jerked into Edward’s, waiting a moment to take the edge off the cold before returning the favour. Edward gasped and rolled his hips up into Oswald’s fist, biting down on his lip to stifle himself. He let it go on for a while longer, enjoying Oswald’s intense look of concentration. 

 

“Let’s try it like this,” he suggested, reluctantly pulling Oswald’s hand off of him and taking both of their cocks between his own hands. “Now move.”

 

Oswald began to rock into his grip, thrusting into the tight press of his hands as Edward gasped beneath him at the sensation of their cocks rubbing together. He started to pick up the pace, accidentally slipping out of Edward’s grasp. Oswald immediately took hold of them again in his own hand, rutting on top of him and making him shake and whine in pleasure from the feeling. He pulled Oswald down into a sloppy kiss, moaning into it as Oswald hips continued the frantic pace. 

 

“I want to be inside you,” Oswald panted, pressing their foreheads together. Edward nodded shakily and put his hands on Oswald’s hips, stilling them. 

 

“Do you want to get me ready for you?” he asked, brushing Oswald’s hair off his forehead, as some strands had fallen out of place. Oswald’s lips tightened and then he shook his head no. “That’s alright, you don’t have to.”

 

“I want to,” Oswald blurted, something pleading in his expression. “I want to do it, I just… I just don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“You won’t hurt me as long as you’re gentle and do as I say,” Edward assured him. “I’ve done this before, on my own. I’ll talk you through the whole thing, nice and slow... show you what I like… how does that sound?” Oswald considered this and nodded, reaching for the lube. 

 

“Alright, just let me know right away if I do anything to hurt you,” Oswald negotiated, coating two fingers in lube.

 

“I will,” Edward promised, reaching for a pillow. He put it under his hips and spread his legs, giving Oswald the best angle to see what he was doing and Edward’s expression at the same time. “I’m sure you know to start with one, though I usually do two.”

 

“One,” Oswald said, carefully circling around Edward’s entrance. Edward rolled his eyes and decided to be patient for the sake of Oswald’s sanity, eyes fluttering closed as Oswald teased his rim. It felt good already, the soft touches setting the nerve endings concentrated there alight, building Edward’s anticipation for the inevitable press inside. Oswald did not disappoint, slowly pushing his slick finger in, both twisting and wiggling the digit inside. It wasn’t exactly what Edward usually did to pleasure himself, but it was pleasant nonetheless. “How’s that?”

 

“Just fine,” Edward said, rubbing his hands over Oswald’s shoulders and down his back. “Relax.”

 

“Shouldn’t I be telling you that?” Oswald muttered, eyes fixated on the sight of his finger disappearing past the rim. Edward shivered at the sudden realization that Oswald was  _ inside _ of him. 

 

“You could, but you need the advice more than I do. I’m used to this,” Edward explained, though he certainly wasn’t used to someone  _ else’s _ fingers exploring him. 

 

“Does this feel good?” Oswald asked, letting his knuckle tease Edward’s rim as it slid in and out. It sent pleasant tingles into his core, but wasn’t exactly mindblowing.

 

“It does feel good, but if you find my prostate it will be even better,” Edward explained. Oswald shot him a look. Really. Was that  _ really _ too technical? 

 

“What else am I supposed to call it?” Edward complained. “My  _ g-spot _ ?”

 

“You’re right,” Oswald blanched, “that’s worse.” For whatever reason, Edward absolutely could not get over the hilarity of the conversation, nor the pained face Oswald had made. He burst out into laughter, pushing his glasses up and covering his eyes. Yet he still saw the look Oswald had given him on the backs of his eyelids, and he could  _ not  _ stop laughing. A moment later he registered Oswald’s joining his high peals of laughter with his own snickering, carefully removing his finger from Edward. 

 

“Your  _ g-spot _ ,” Oswald mocked, and Edward looked at him just in time to see his nose crinkle up in distaste, sending him into another fit of laughter. Eventually they both settled down, Edward wiping at the tears under his eyes. Oswald leaned down and brushed another away. “You missed one.”

 

“So, are you still under the impression that you have to be good at this right away?” Edward asked. “Because I don’t know about you, but I’m having a  _ fantastic _ time.” Oswald smiled and kissed him, fingers brushing between his cheeks. 

 

“You were right,” Oswald conceded. Edward mock gasped and raised a hand to his lips. 

 

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you. Did you just say that I was— _ ah! _ ” Without warning, Oswald had pushed two fingers inside and crooked them up, nailing his prostate dead-on. “Oh my  _ goodness _ .That’s not f- _ fair! _ ”

 

Oswald had done it again, shoving them up against the bundle of nerves with stupefying accuracy. “It doesn’t sound like you mind.” 

 

Edward huffed and rolled his hips down onto Oswald’s fingers, his own grasping the sheets as pleasure surged through him. “I’ll—I’ll excuse your cheating  _ just  _ this once.”

 

“Glad to hear it,” Oswald replied, smirking and proceeding to drive Edward wild as he continued rubbing over his prostate in what had to be the most unfairly good feeling he’d ever experienced. He was only able to endure it for so long before he needed to feel more stretching him, gyrating his hips into the press of Oswald’s fingers.

 

“More,” he demanded, lifting his hands from their tangle in the sheets to dig his nails into Oswald’s shoulders instead. He threw his head back into the sheets as Oswald twisted his fingers in one last time and then withdrew, moaning breathlessly at the sensation. “Oh dear… how are you so  _ good _ at this?”

 

“I’m just watching you,” Oswald shrugged, kissing him and then pulling back to coat a third finger and slowly push it inside. Before long Edward was a wreck, sweat dripping and collecting on his collarbones, his hair sticking to his damp forehead even as he thrashed against the sheets, calling Oswald’s name amidst murmurs of how good he felt. 

 

“Please,” Edward begged, “Please, I want you inside me.” He thought he’d go mad if he didn’t feel Oswald stretching him soon, filling him up and taking him, claiming him in a way no one had ever done before. “I want you to make me yours.”

 

“I want you so badly,” Oswald groaned, leaning down for a fierce kiss, teeth clacking with it before Edward righted them. “Are you sure you’re ready?”

 

“I’m ready. I want to do this with you more than I’ve ever wanted anything with anyone else. You should know that… that I’ve never really let someone touch me like this before. I never trusted anyone enough to ask for it. You’re the only one, Oswald.” He leaned up for a gentle kiss, letting his eyes close, soaking up the sense of acceptance and belonging that he’d only ever felt with Oswald. “I love you.”

 

“I love you, too,” Oswald murmured, kissing him sweetly as he ever-so-gently removed his fingers from inside of Edward. He moaned at the loss, feeling his entrance flutter around emptiness. The snap of the bottle drew his attention as Oswald coated himself liberally with lubricant, pressing the tip of his cock to Edward’s hole and a kiss to his temple. “Tell me if we need to stop.”

 

Edward wouldn’t dream of it.

 

Oswald sank inside in one slow push, the hot thickness of him splitting Edward apart in a way he’d never felt before. He wiggled his hips just a little bit deeper and bottomed out, groin flush to Edward’s cheeks. 

 

“I don’t believe I’m going to last very long,” Oswald admitted, bowing his head. Edward couldn't see his face with the way his hair was hanging in front of it, but he could see that Oswald was shaking with the effort to keep still, to keep from hurting him. 

 

“Me neither,” Edward said, clenching despite himself around Oswald’s cock, practically squirming on it. It just felt so  _ good _ to have Oswald inside him—Oswald was  _ inside of him _ . Edward moaned high and breathy, nails dragging up from the small of Oswald’s back to his shoulders. It felt like completion, like everything between them had led to this moment. From the first moment he saw Oswald, this was where their story was meant to lead. 

 

“You feel so good,” Edward gasped, hips rocking gently, testing the waters.

 

“So do you. You—you’re so tight,” Oswald groaned, shuffling on his knees. 

 

“How’s your ankle?” Edward asked, rubbing over his biceps. If it began to hurt, he wanted to know so that they could stop or take a break or whatever Oswald needed—

 

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” Oswald shrugged. Edward nodded in understanding and settled back against the sheets.

 

“You can move.”

 

Nothing could have prepared him for the intensity of the pleasure he felt once Oswald began fucking him properly. Starting slow and gentle, the stretch of Oswald’s girth around his rim was enough to send waves of hot pleasure through him. But as he picked up the pace, Oswald had found the perfect angle to tilt Edward’s hips back and begin battering his prostate relentlessly. Edward could do little more than wrap his long legs around Oswald’s hips and guide him into doing it over and over again. His fingers dug into Oswald’s cheeks and urged him to thrust harder, crying out Oswald’s name along with a litany of mores, pleases, harders, and fasters. 

 

“I think I’m going to come soon,” Oswald said, teeth gritted in concentration as he continued pounding Edward into the mattress. Edward felt helpless to the pleasure Oswald was giving him as he laid beneath him. He was gripping Edward’s hips so hard they would surely bruise, fingers digging in to help Edward meet every powerful slam of his cock back inside him. Edward didn’t think he’d be very far behind, not when every stroke of Oswald filling him sent a feeling like lightning dancing up his spine and jolting through his gut. 

 

“Me too,” Edward moaned, unable to stop himself from gasping breathlessly at Oswald’s every thrust as he neared climax. He wrapped a hand around himself as Oswald’s rhythm became more erratic, stroking in time as best he could. Oswald groaned and his hips stuttered, continuing to fuck Edward even through his orgasm. He leaned down and claimed Edward’s mouth in a kiss, biting at his full bottom lip and whispering  _ I love you _ . It was all Edward needed to tip over the edge, and Oswald’s kiss muffled his scream as he came. He sank bonelessly into the mattress as Oswald continued to ravish him, tongue sweeping into his mouth and hips rocking softly into him still. Eventually he needed to truly catch his breath, pushing Oswald away. Chest heaving, he smiled dopily up at his lover. “You are—by  _ far _ —the best I’ve ever had.” 

 

“Good,” Oswald replied, clearly smug. “I suppose the reverse goes without saying, seeing as you’re my  _ only _ .” Edward smacked his chest and giggled, still surfing the post-sex oxytocin wave. He leaned up for a gentle kiss, enjoying the feeling of having Oswald inside him while it lasted. Inevitably, he withdrew, Edward hissing at the sudden soreness and emptiness. Oswald kissed his forehead with a promise of, “I’ll be right back.”

 

He returned with water and a warm, wet cloth, gently swiping at the mess he’d created between Edward’s legs. Edward had felt his come dripping between his thighs and immediately yanked the pillow out from under his hips while waiting for him to emerge from the master bath. Oswald’s release now stained their covers, but Edward was far too exhausted to do anything about that now. When he was through dragging the cloth between Edward’s cheeks, he swept it over his stomach, getting rid of the stickiness from Edward’s own climax. 

 

“Thank you,” Edward said, pulling up the sheets and slipping beneath them. He held them open for Oswald, but the other man remained standing and handed him the glass of water. 

 

“Drink some,” Oswald instructed, standing vigil by the bed.

 

Edward obediently took a sip and said, “Sit down, you’re making me nervous.”

 

Oswald perched awkwardly on the edge of the bed, and Edward couldn’t help but be annoyed by the distance. “Is there a reason you’re not getting in bed right now?”

 

“I’m not sure what you need,” Oswald explained, reaching out and resting a hand on Edward’s leg through the bedcovers. Edward’s expression softened, and he reached out and placed the glass of water back on the nightstand. 

 

“I’m fine, Oswald,” Edward assured him. “You did just fine. The water was more than enough. I only want you to hold me right now.”

 

“You’re sure?” Oswald asked, lifting the covers and sliding in. 

 

“I’m positive,” Edward replied. “Cuddling is absolutely the only thing I need from you after sex.”

 

“I need to make sure you’re okay,” Oswald countered, running a hand back through Edward’s hair. Edward sighed and rolled over, throwing a leg over Oswald’s lap and resting his head on his chest. 

 

“I suppose that’s acceptable,” Edward conceded. “Just don’t stay away for so long, I was missing you.”

 

“I was gone for a minute,” Oswald said, combing his fingers through the soft strands of Edward’s locks and smiling down at him.

 

“Felt like forever,” Edward complained drowsily. “The bed was cold.”

 

“I promise I won’t do it again, love.”

 

“Good,” Edward said, and promptly dozed off to the feeling of Oswald gently caressing his hair. 

 

~ ~ ~

 

The first thing Oswald noticed when he woke up was how well rested he felt. Nothing seemed different, so that was odd. Odd, until the memories of the previous night returned. He felt a smile grow across his face and rolled over to face where Edward should be, only marginally disappointed that he hadn’t woken up to the feeling of Edward in his arms. 

 

He frowned when he realized the spot on the bed beside him was empty.

 

Had it all been a dream? He tensed; his heart wouldn’t be able to handle that if it were true. 

 

But no, there were wrinkles and impressions on the other side of the bed, a partially-empty glass of water on the nightstand, and - he glanced away out of an ingrained respectability that many among his employ might call prudishness - stains on the covers. Last night had definitely happened.

 

Only then did Oswald notice that the scent of pancakes and cinnamon had permeated the room, warm and inviting, coming from the direction of the kitchen. 

 

Oswald climbed out of bed, only getting ready perfunctorily before hurrying down to the kitchen. As he suspected, Edward was there, wearing his apron over his undershirt and boxers from the previous day, apparently not having taken the time to stop back in his own room. Oswald made a mental note to ask Edward if he would like to move into the master bedroom with him later that day. 

 

For now, though, he had something else on his mind. Edward was preoccupied with his cooking, seemingly not noticing Oswald as he entered the room, so Oswald took the opportunity to do what he’d wanted to do every other morning he’d woken to Edward in the kitchen. 

 

_ You can do whatever you want to me. _

 

Oswald had somehow regained Edward’s trust, and this time he knew to cherish it. To cherish Edward. And that was going to start by assuring Edward that  _ yes _ Oswald did love him, constantly and consistently. 

 

“Good morning, love,” he said, wrapping his arms around the man and pressing a kiss to his shoulder. Edward jumped fractionally before relaxing back against him, “Good morning, Oswald. I was going to bring you breakfast in bed. Usually you sleep later than this.”

 

“The bed was cold,” Oswald repeated Edward’s words from the night before. Edward twisted around to beam at him, touched that he had both remembered and shared the sentiment. Before he could turn back, Oswald captured his lips in a brief kiss.

 

“You’re too sweet,” Edward said when he could, a blush creeping across his face. Oswald thought he looked gorgeous, “Not as sweet as you. Or whatever it is you’re cooking.”

 

Edward glanced back at the griddle, “Cinnamon apple pancakes? I hope you like them.”

 

“Mmm, I’m sure I shall,” Oswald agreed, before a thought struck him. He resisted the urge to keep it to himself and said, “You know, we could  _ still _ have breakfast in bed…?”

 

“I think I know what you’re implying,” Edward turned to look at him, “And that’s unsanitary.”

 

“ _ Unsanitary? _ ”

 

“Mhmm,” Edward nodded, “I can list some facts about bacteria if you - “

 

“Please don’t,” Oswald cut in, “Although I’m glad you’re back to keeping my plans realistic with your facts.”

 

Edward froze, “Oh my gosh. I am! I’m back! I’m smart again!”

 

Oswald grinned at him, keeping his mouth shut about the truth that it had all been imagined, “You sure are. But since  _ my suggestion  _ was  _ unsanitary _ , I guess we’ll just have to postpone our celebration of your victory until after breakfast.”

 

He chuckled as Edward shivered under his next kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a long time since I wrote "Broken, Not a Burden", and this fic is in an entirely different tone (and with an additional author!), so hopefully it feels like a sequel and not a totally separate work. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope it was enjoyable & feel free to leave comments/kudos if you liked it!


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